Reborn

No matter how much I mess up, I find myself born again in his love. Renewed, cleansed, and totally and completely forgiven by him. God this is for you, I love you Lord.

In his death, I am made new. In his suffering, I am renewed. My heart mended and healed, for the very first time. What love, that kidnaps me. What love, that overwhelms me. What grace, that found me and continues to forgive me. Until his coming for me I live in him. In his power I find my strength. In his love I find my ability to love. In his grace, I find my ability to forgive and to show grace myself. In you, I loose myself. I loose all that I regret and all that I am afraid of. I am reborn, made new in you. For I am born to serve. I was chosen at birth for a purpose. I was hand picked for a cause.

If my people, who are called by name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then I will hear them from Heaven, and I will forgive their sin, and I'll heal their Land. -2nd Chronicles 7:14

Work, Dance

So... school started Monday, such a joy. But atleast it's my senior year. Yeah, this blog is a bit less joyful about the school experience I do suppose. Maybe it's because we don't always appreciate things while they last? I don't know. But, one thing I do know for sure you have to work at it. You have to try really hard or else it will either not be done right or, in the end, it won't be worth while. Just like our relationship with God. While God does indeed help us, why should we expect him to do all the work? A relationship, like the tango, demands two.

One and two, and up and down. I do this dance alone. You're too busy, you're too consumed to time out to care about this bond. This dance for two, this sweet play. I can't dance alone, and you can't expect me to. I need you to work with me, work with me in this dance. And when we finish we can say the victory was ours, we did our best. The rythm was off and the step wasn't the best. But we, we danced to the true rythm and the true beat. So who can find fault in us. Let's dance together.

"I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." -2 Timothy 4:7

Keep me, Keep you

My final year of highschool begins in two days. It's come so fast at times, and at others it hasn't come fast enough. It's the beginning of so much. But at the same time I can't help but realize that for some things, it's the end. And it can hurt, I know though that if you have been a part of my life you won't be forgotten. If you have been a part of me, with you you'll take a piece of me. And a piece of you I hope you'll give to me. For friendship is a God ordained standard. It's something that, if true, no mere human can destroy. If you are my friend, you are my family. This is to you, my friends.

So please, please keep me in your mind. Even if time and your stature haveleft me behind. May the cineplex of time, play in a constant loop; Running over and over in your mind. I hope that in the bedlam of life, that you'll find time to remember me; and remember you. I pray that God may will our path's to cross again someday. Don't forget, a man who forgets his past is cursed to never leave the confines of it. But remember them, me, you, we. Remember what it was that made this place, this small homely place, a home. Remember when you are overwhelmed by a Ritzy world to be thankful. Remember that it isn't by your hand. For all success is in the Lord. So please, may I stay in your mind. As a kind of sunshine. When you think of me, may you smile. May your clouds fade away. For that's what happens when I think of the then, in our yester-year. May your every wish be granted to you, I pray. May love find you, especially when you need it the least. To keep you humble, to keep you human. May God have grace, that he will never shine away from your face. Our roads now diverge my friend, but it won't stay this way... not to the end.

Confessions of a Fine Arts Participant 1

Monday Night, side note: Got cussed out by one British lady today, Shannon protected us though!

Stay true to your calling. It will be hard, and at times, it will hurt. But despite the hurt from the pain, our God is always there. He's almighty. I don't know how his path is all the way... And there's no road map either. But if I follow him, I will always end up where I want to be; even if I didn't know that I wanted to be there. Your guiding system NEVER looses course!!

-August 3, 2009

Speaker: Mark Vega

Orlando9, night 1.

Defeat

It's so weird how we can do so, so well. Only to be defeated, all to often by ourselves. By our own stupid weaknesses, and losses. And all we can do is pray we don't make the same mistake again... Even though, so often, the mistakes we make are the ones that we repeat. The ones that really hurt you. The ones that you don't want anyone to know about. The ones you can't tell anyone about. The ones that affect you, no matter how much you try to forget them. Even if they don't seem too significant to others.

Why is it that I must go through this same old story again. And I know it's my fault. No one else forced it upon me. Though there might be some people who are always there urging it on, no one can ever really make you fail. I am sorry for it honestly and truly each time that it happens. And yet I don't ever seem to be able to overcome it. So often I think it's because we fail at giving certain things to God. So we fail at achieving full freeness, and relief. And it's not because he doesn't want to offer it. He does. So very much. And it pains him to see us fail. Especially when he sees us fail, and it hurt us because we failed ourselves. When part of the process involves us just forgiving ourselves and letting ourselves over come the pain and the utter embarrassment of it all. But his love still shines through. Proving itself over and over. All we have to do is realize to just fully let go, to overcome.